They say the best time to start was yesterday, the second best time to start is today.

Attempt 4063…

How do you write a blog post like this? One where you admit to your consistent and persistent failure to change things which would bring you the life you want? For 45 years I’ve been trying to change…ok, maybe not all 45 years, but definitely the last 25. So here I am again, putting out there that 2025 is going to be the year it happens! But is it?

That we will truly find out in 365 days. Until then I hope to gather enough positive feedback to keep me going through the inevitable down periods, the times I find it hard to go to the gym, to read the book, to do the mundane but necessary things in life. Accepting my previous failures and being honest about them is one positive step. And there have been many. I have tried to blog and to be social with my journey more times than I can count. Each time I’ve failed; for numerous reasons, not just one constant. If I am being honest, I don’t knowingly crave positive feedback on what I do, but I can quickly lose interest if I don’t get it. It’s a contradiction in me that when people praise me I shy away from it, but it also inspires me to step forward more (so please, be social and interact with me!).

If I am looking at positives self reflection has been a big one. I recognise I hold myself back because I think parts of me may be embarrassing, and I am trying to let go of what others may think. The fat man at the gym is the most easily bruised of all the egos. Recently I have started to develop a “don’t give a fuck” attitude towards social embarrassment. If people cringe or judge, so what. Most people don’t give a damn who I am or what I am doing, a small amount will react positively, and a smaller amount negatively. But why do I think they’re right enough, or carry enough currency, to impact me? I don’t now, and that’s a change. Sure, there will be bits of doubt still creeping in, but it’s becoming less and less.

Something that really has helped me is starting my own business, getting away from a toxic environment that really had me struggling. It’s funny, I’ve thought I was in toxic environments before, but once you are truly in one you feel it in every bone in your body. As I stepped out into the world alone, I realised I had to put myself out there in a different way. I attended a networking seminar, and they guy running it pointed out how easy it is to be shy and retiring at these events, but everyone is there for the same reason. They are there to meet and learn, so why would someone think you stupid for approaching them and just chatting. I now think of a lot of situations like that; the gym, social media, anywhere really. Yes, there will be toxic trolls that I will bump into, but why let them rule the roost? I have better things to focus on.

I have now been at the gym consistently for more than a month, clocking in over 20 sessions, doing what I know works for me. And it’s great. Sometimes I still get a little self conscious but I have an answer for that. Hoodies – hence why there’s one in our shop! I lift my hood and turn up my music; it creates a no distraction zone that works for me. I am sure some people must look at me and think that this fat guy thinks he’s some sort of bodybuilding superstar…but I don’t care. And neither will most people.

One final point on my change, I am channelling a friends wellness philosophy. I know it works for him, as he’s now in his 70s and still out trains 99% of the human population. However, he has a certain mental rigidity and resilience that I am not ashamed to admit I lack. So a big part of my journey for the next 3 months is applying that philosophy and approach to my life, and my training. I have been helping him document this philosophy, and it will be released as a book in the next few months, so this is a great time to trial it and show that even people like me, people who have lacked the sticking power in the past, can change and can take lessons and motivation from others. This is one that you really should stay tuned for!

So here I am, beginning to open up and hope that this resonates with people, and ultimately helps you on your journey. Whether you want to change physically, mentally, emotionally or all of the above, I intend to show you that it is possible, regardless of your baggage, age, starting point or previous failed attempts. The best time to start was yesterday; the second best time is now.

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